Being all alone in the mountains gives one lots of time to think. I'd like to write that I thought of the true meaning of life or the way to end suffering throughout the world, a new recreational drug with no harmful side effects, whiled peas or something groovy like that but mostly I just thought about being alone.
And not just being alone on a mountain hiding out from the law either. You see, even before I was alone on the mountain I was alone. I left Jason's mother 33 years ago and ran off his step mother 26 years ago and for the most part have been alone ever since. Even when I was with someone I was usually alone. I'd spent more years traveling alone than most of my friends had been alive always unable to make that final connection from me to us. Out riding fences not because they needed riding but just because I wanted to remember where the fences once stood.
Or some flowery literary phrase like that...
It would have been really nice to have someone on those cold nights, someone to talk to, someone to hold, to console... Men need that, to feel like heroes, like they can fix things, like the women in their lives can't get by without them. I know, it's mostly a myth these days but being a myth doesn't make us need it any less-- just frustrates us more.
I remembered a conversation I had with a woman I had when we were both in our late 30s, when she said men no longer impressed her. My reaction was of course men no longer impress you, you've already seen it all. If you're waiting around for some man to show you something you've never seen you're going to wait a very long time. Like me, she's in her mid 50s now and like me she's still all alone. It just never clicked with her and I and no man ever impressed her.
You see, it's the animistic nature of human courtship rituals that messes us all up. Despite all our advances and all our technology, when it comes to choosing our mates we still revert back to the animal deep within us with the male of the species being expected to put on a display or feat to attract the attention of the female. In most birds the brightest colored males get first pick of the females. Other birds pick their males by how good he builds the nest before she moves in. No nest, no cooing.
In mammals it's usually size of the male, the volume of a roar or the last male standing that gets the females. Many an animal has fought to the death for one night with the female of his dreams. For adolescent men it's hardly any different. It some social groups it's feats of strength, others feats of the mind and still others feats of the wallet but somehow you must win her affection and impress her by doing things no other man has done in her presence. And the older a woman gets the farther the bar gets pushed. For example: I got my second wife's attention with an 8' tall Valentine's card that ended up on the local TV news. After that, every year she expected more, bigger, greater... it became impossible. You think I had it bad, just imagine the poor soul who followed behind me.
I've written poetry, flowery letters, poured out my heart in prose, spent 6 months wages on gifts I couldn't afford, penned books, bought cars and houses. (Funny, I'd forgotten I timed the publishing of that book to come out on Jason's birthday.) I've watched other men do the same. My friend, Songbear writes and sings love songs. When he's around my buddies and I don't even try. When he unpacks that guitar we all just go home knowing he'll be calling in a few days wanting advice on how to get her out of his house. Well, that was until just a few years ago when I think he finally found a keeper.
And it's not women's fault either. Something in our genetic make-up, our DNA or the society we live in teaches women to expect men to impress them. It's normal, natural, a pain in the ass. Especially if you don't get it behind you while you're still young.
Yeah, I spent a lot of time thinking about being alone, thinking about how nice it would be to have someone to share my sleeping bag. And then I thought, She'd probably just keep me awake all night long complaining about sleeping on the same rock I'm sleeping on. I can have a back ache without all that BS.
Of course I wasn't completely alone. The giant dog was there and the old motorcycle always had another poem to share even if it had nothing to do with what was on my mind.
a chill was in the air.
My pipes delight, their tone just right
and us without a care
when from the far horizon rose a nose despite a face...
____
Donny looked at the caller ID on his telephone. It was Bobbie. "Donny," she said, "Someone's breaking in my garage. I think they're trying to steal my bike!"
"I'll be there in 2 minutes," Donny said as he ran out the door, "Can you hold 'em that long?"
"I think so," Bobbie replied, "Katei, Carole and Raezin are here with me."
"Good," Donny said as he burned tires in his pick-up. "I'm a mile away, I'll be there in a minute."
A minute later Donny slid into Bobbie's driveway to find the 3 girls trading kicks and chops with three men. Knowing he was too old for that nonsense he pulled his revolver from his side and fired a warning shot causing the 3 men to stop fighting and run away. "Why did you do that?" Bobbie asked. "We almost had 'em."
"I know," Donny grinned, "but what were you going to do with them once you got them?"
"Yeah," Raezin grinned, "they weren't very pretty."
"He's right," Carole added, "We'd just have to take care of them. Who needs all that?"
About a half hour later, Steve and Wooley arrived from Burlington. After a very thorough search of the entire property they discovered a tiny remote control explosive device attached to Katei's motorcycle. With Donny's help they disarmed it at Katei's dining room table while the girls watched. "What are you going to do with it?" Raezin asked.
"We're going to save it," Donny said, "We can use it against the aliens.
"You're going to destroy it," Katei said, "If we start blowing things up and killing folks then we'll be no better than they are."
"Yeah," Carole agreed, "we can't lower ourselves to their level."
"But they were planning to kill you," Steve said.
"It doesn't matter," Katie ordered, "You're going to destroy that bomb."
"We're not taking orders from a bunch of women," Wooley said.
Without saying a word, Raezin reached into her purse and laid a rock on the table. "What's this?" Wooley grumbled as he turned the rock over.
"You'll take orders from a rock but you won't listen to a woman," Katei said.
"Don't pay him any attention," Steve laughed, "He's still married, he takes orders from a woman every day."
"Turn me over, I'm done," Wooley laughed, "Billy is getting us is in a jam even when he's nowhere to be found."
"Been that way all my life," Donny said.
"You mean like the time he blew up your ash tray when he wasn't even home?" Steve asked.
"Don't even go there," Donny grumbled.
"Oh, please go there," Bobbie laughed, "We girls would love to hear about that wouldn't we girls?" The girls all agreed.
Continue to Missing Pieces.
