"Incoming! Incoming!" the motorcycle began shouting, "Everyone take cover immediately! Incoming!"
We all ran for cover under work benches and behind steel tool chests. Seconds later Katei Cranford rolled into an open bay door riding a highly modified Zero Skateboard. "Why is everyone hiding," she asked as she took off her helmet and shook loose her locks of rainbow hair.
"Our security system thought you were a guided missile," I answered holding my fingers in typical Richard M Nixon style.
"Well I was moving purdy fast," Katei grinned putting on her best Southern draw for all us old men in the shop.
"It was those Military spec. Department of Defense T91163578932658756900065 dash A rollers you're using for wheels," Donny said. "That's what tripped it off."
"You know what those are?" Katei asked.
"Know what they are," Donny replied. "I made 'em. Question is, how did you get them?"
"I bought them from a military surplus store online," Katei answered.
"That figures," Fred said, "Our tax dollars probably paid out millions for more than we'll ever need then sold them to retailers for pennies on the dollar."
"Well they sure do make the best skateboard wheels," Katei smiled.
"I bet they do," Donny replied. "It takes me almost a week to make each wheel. We can't even buy the alloy they're made of so I have to begin by making the metal before I can start machining it."
"Well Katei," I interrupted her inquisition, "you're as beautiful as ever. I haven't seen you since we occupied Greensboro. What brings you to Burlington?"
"It's the Stench," Katei replied. "The Tall White Aliens have him."
"How'd that happen?" Fred asked.
"He stole a hook and ladder truck and got caught," Katie answered. "We're trying to raise money to make his bail and we're hoping y'all will put aside your differences and help.
"Let 'em keep him," Fred said. "That's just one less problem to worry about."
"Can't do that," Donny cautioned. "If the Tall Whites keep Jeff for too long they might manage to take control of his brain."
"Yeah," I added, "and that's one brain we don't want to have to fight. Trust me, I've lost to that brain before."
"So does that mean you'll help us get Jeff out of jail," Katei asked.
"We'll do everything in our power," I said. "And thanks to Jeff I think I know where to start. Let's say you and I ride over to Greensboro and look up Councilwoman Marikay Abuzuaiter, our newest city councilman, Tony Wilkins and Councilwoman Nancy Barakat Vaughan ."
"You think they'll help," Fred asked.
"If they won't then we'll have no choice but to nuke Downtown Greensboro," Donny said knowing exactly what I had in mind.
"You ready to go?" I asked Katei.
"If you're waiting on me you're backing up?" Katei laughed as she sped away on her skateboard with me right behind on the Wackemall 750 enjoying the view.
Continue to What Kind Of Bird Can't Sing?
We all ran for cover under work benches and behind steel tool chests. Seconds later Katei Cranford rolled into an open bay door riding a highly modified Zero Skateboard. "Why is everyone hiding," she asked as she took off her helmet and shook loose her locks of rainbow hair.
"Our security system thought you were a guided missile," I answered holding my fingers in typical Richard M Nixon style.
"Well I was moving purdy fast," Katei grinned putting on her best Southern draw for all us old men in the shop.
"It was those Military spec. Department of Defense T91163578932658756900065 dash A rollers you're using for wheels," Donny said. "That's what tripped it off."
"You know what those are?" Katei asked.
"Know what they are," Donny replied. "I made 'em. Question is, how did you get them?"
"I bought them from a military surplus store online," Katei answered.
"That figures," Fred said, "Our tax dollars probably paid out millions for more than we'll ever need then sold them to retailers for pennies on the dollar."
"Well they sure do make the best skateboard wheels," Katei smiled.
"I bet they do," Donny replied. "It takes me almost a week to make each wheel. We can't even buy the alloy they're made of so I have to begin by making the metal before I can start machining it."
"Well Katei," I interrupted her inquisition, "you're as beautiful as ever. I haven't seen you since we occupied Greensboro. What brings you to Burlington?"
"It's the Stench," Katei replied. "The Tall White Aliens have him."
"How'd that happen?" Fred asked.
"He stole a hook and ladder truck and got caught," Katie answered. "We're trying to raise money to make his bail and we're hoping y'all will put aside your differences and help.
"Let 'em keep him," Fred said. "That's just one less problem to worry about."
"Can't do that," Donny cautioned. "If the Tall Whites keep Jeff for too long they might manage to take control of his brain."
"Yeah," I added, "and that's one brain we don't want to have to fight. Trust me, I've lost to that brain before."
"So does that mean you'll help us get Jeff out of jail," Katei asked.
"We'll do everything in our power," I said. "And thanks to Jeff I think I know where to start. Let's say you and I ride over to Greensboro and look up Councilwoman Marikay Abuzuaiter, our newest city councilman, Tony Wilkins and Councilwoman Nancy Barakat Vaughan ."
"You think they'll help," Fred asked.
"If they won't then we'll have no choice but to nuke Downtown Greensboro," Donny said knowing exactly what I had in mind.
"You ready to go?" I asked Katei.
"If you're waiting on me you're backing up?" Katei laughed as she sped away on her skateboard with me right behind on the Wackemall 750 enjoying the view.
Continue to What Kind Of Bird Can't Sing?
