Jo worked really hard and just as I figured, by the time she was finished, the old motorcycle was handlebars over wheels crazy about her. He even tried to follow Jo home but thanks to the Burlington Police Department and Jo using her head we managed to get him back in the shop and safely chained to a Buick 455 engine block we were planning to sell in our online store. Or to Salvage America if no one wanted to buy it. That's the thing with metal, it always has value. Yeah, there were places closer to the shop where we could sell scrap but Chris and I are old friends who help each other by doing business with one another whenever we can.
With the motorcycle now securely chained to the engine block Jo could now go home but before she did she walked over to the motorcycle and said, "Don't worry, I'll be back tomorrow, I've still got buttons to make. Bye."
"Bye," the motorcycle said, "see you tomorrow."
"See you tomorrow," Jo said as she walked back to her car. The Burlington police officers were still shaking their heads in disbelief.
"I've got a problem," the motorcycle said.
"What kind of problem?" I asked.
"It's Katei," the Veggiecycle replied, "How do I let her down gently?"
"Why let her down at all," Wooley asked. "Why not just keep both of them?"
Of course we knew Wooley was kidding but the motorcycle had no idea. "Both of them?" it asked, "but how can I do that when I've only got a solo seat?"
"You mean you're not bike enough for two women?" Wooley laughed.
"Of course I'm bike enough," the motorcycle grumbled. "I just don't have enough seating. Will you guys fit me with a buddy seat?"
"I don't think so," I replied.
"Why not?" the motorcycle complained.
"Because," Wooley answered, "if we give you room for two then soon you'll be wanting room for a third."
"Yeah," Donny added, "things have a way of getting out of hand with you just like they do with Billy."
"Hey," I said, "that wasn't nice."
"No," Steve laughed, "but it's true."
"Seriously," the motorcycle pleaded, "I need a buddy seat so I can ride Katei and Jo around and not have to break either of their hearts."
By that time Veggie had decided to take a break from sunning in his recliner and had walked into the shop just in time to catch the tail end of the conversation. Like the rest of us he was speechless. How were we going to explain to a motorcycle with an obvious juvenile emotional understanding of life and no understanding of women that neither Jo nor Katei were interested in him and that he was the one who was about to get a broken heart? We couldn't so being like most men we went back to work knowing that at some point the decisions would be made for him.
While were were working, Adam Farmer came over to show me a video with evidence that Bayer was plotting to kill all the honey bees by distributing a chemical known as Neonicotinoid.
"Wouldn't you know it," Veggie said, "Our old friends at Monsanto are in on it too."
"It sure looks that way," I replied.
"So what are you going to do about it," Adam asked.
"Adam," I replied, "to be honest, old friend, right now we've got a paying customer with a 100' tall sculpture they want us to build. But don't think it won't be weighing heavy on our minds."
"So," Wooley asked, "being that the shop is only about 15' tall, how are we going to build a 100' tall statue and how will we ever get it loaded on a truck?"
"That's easy," Steve answered, "We build it in the front yard closest to the street where there's nothing overhead and it's easiest to get to with a crane."
"I'll go rent a portable welder," Donny added, "so we won't be tripping the circuit breakers all day long."
"The fork lift is pulling in as we speak," I said. "The steel is supposed to be here this afternoon. I hope Y'all like welding up in the air 'cause you know my welds are crap."
"Don't matter if we like it," Donny said, "It's what we got to do."
"Ain't nothin' but a thing," Steve said.
"Well, one thing about it," Wooley said, "We're making more off of this in a month than our old jobs paid us in a year."
"Can't beat that," Adam said, "maybe I need to diversify?"
"Don't worry," I said, "business is picking up fast, first time we get behind we'll be calling."
"It's a deal," Adam said. As everyone was getting back to work Adam looked at me and asked, "Is it really true what they say that you and Veggie used to ride around wiping out fields of genetically modified foods all those years ago when the two of you used to disappear for months at a time?"
"Well, mostly it was Veggie," I answered. "I came along to be his historian and write it all down but once in a while journalists actually get caught up in the conflicts."
"So did Monsanto really try to kill Veggie?" Adam asked.
"Not only did they try to kill him," I answered, "by all rights he was dead for years. How he ripped himself from the earth and came back to help me take over Wackemall Inc. is a miracle."
"So do you think there's enough of us to take on Monsanto now," he asked.
"Not a chance in Hell," I answered, "But I keep hoping for miracles and hope we make the best decisions."
"Me too," Adam said, "me too."
Continue to New And Improved.
With the motorcycle now securely chained to the engine block Jo could now go home but before she did she walked over to the motorcycle and said, "Don't worry, I'll be back tomorrow, I've still got buttons to make. Bye."
"Bye," the motorcycle said, "see you tomorrow."
"See you tomorrow," Jo said as she walked back to her car. The Burlington police officers were still shaking their heads in disbelief.
"I've got a problem," the motorcycle said.
"What kind of problem?" I asked.
"It's Katei," the Veggiecycle replied, "How do I let her down gently?"
"Why let her down at all," Wooley asked. "Why not just keep both of them?"
Of course we knew Wooley was kidding but the motorcycle had no idea. "Both of them?" it asked, "but how can I do that when I've only got a solo seat?"
"You mean you're not bike enough for two women?" Wooley laughed.
"Of course I'm bike enough," the motorcycle grumbled. "I just don't have enough seating. Will you guys fit me with a buddy seat?"
"I don't think so," I replied.
"Why not?" the motorcycle complained.
"Because," Wooley answered, "if we give you room for two then soon you'll be wanting room for a third."
"Yeah," Donny added, "things have a way of getting out of hand with you just like they do with Billy."
"Hey," I said, "that wasn't nice."
"No," Steve laughed, "but it's true."
"Seriously," the motorcycle pleaded, "I need a buddy seat so I can ride Katei and Jo around and not have to break either of their hearts."
By that time Veggie had decided to take a break from sunning in his recliner and had walked into the shop just in time to catch the tail end of the conversation. Like the rest of us he was speechless. How were we going to explain to a motorcycle with an obvious juvenile emotional understanding of life and no understanding of women that neither Jo nor Katei were interested in him and that he was the one who was about to get a broken heart? We couldn't so being like most men we went back to work knowing that at some point the decisions would be made for him.
While were were working, Adam Farmer came over to show me a video with evidence that Bayer was plotting to kill all the honey bees by distributing a chemical known as Neonicotinoid.
"Wouldn't you know it," Veggie said, "Our old friends at Monsanto are in on it too."
"It sure looks that way," I replied.
"So what are you going to do about it," Adam asked.
"Adam," I replied, "to be honest, old friend, right now we've got a paying customer with a 100' tall sculpture they want us to build. But don't think it won't be weighing heavy on our minds."
"So," Wooley asked, "being that the shop is only about 15' tall, how are we going to build a 100' tall statue and how will we ever get it loaded on a truck?"
"That's easy," Steve answered, "We build it in the front yard closest to the street where there's nothing overhead and it's easiest to get to with a crane."
"I'll go rent a portable welder," Donny added, "so we won't be tripping the circuit breakers all day long."
"The fork lift is pulling in as we speak," I said. "The steel is supposed to be here this afternoon. I hope Y'all like welding up in the air 'cause you know my welds are crap."
"Don't matter if we like it," Donny said, "It's what we got to do."
"Ain't nothin' but a thing," Steve said.
"Well, one thing about it," Wooley said, "We're making more off of this in a month than our old jobs paid us in a year."
"Can't beat that," Adam said, "maybe I need to diversify?"
"Don't worry," I said, "business is picking up fast, first time we get behind we'll be calling."
"It's a deal," Adam said. As everyone was getting back to work Adam looked at me and asked, "Is it really true what they say that you and Veggie used to ride around wiping out fields of genetically modified foods all those years ago when the two of you used to disappear for months at a time?"
"Well, mostly it was Veggie," I answered. "I came along to be his historian and write it all down but once in a while journalists actually get caught up in the conflicts."
"So did Monsanto really try to kill Veggie?" Adam asked.
"Not only did they try to kill him," I answered, "by all rights he was dead for years. How he ripped himself from the earth and came back to help me take over Wackemall Inc. is a miracle."
"So do you think there's enough of us to take on Monsanto now," he asked.
"Not a chance in Hell," I answered, "But I keep hoping for miracles and hope we make the best decisions."
"Me too," Adam said, "me too."
Continue to New And Improved.
